Question:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
You don’t need to talk to Angelo — you need to throw the bastard the hell out — but not before rubbing *his* nose in some cat poop before he seriously injures, cripples, or kills your cat. Your cat is under *severe* stress and terror and *screaming* for help — He’s literally scaring the shit of your cat. Connect the dots: * "Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat." * "I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat," * "I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room". * "Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Ray Charles could make the connection. There is *nothing* wrong with your cat that won’t resolve immediately with his departure.. You must decide which is more important – your *obligation* and *responsibility* to a feeling, helpless, trusting, sensitive creature who has entrusted you with her safety and very life or the "friendship" of an insensitive asshole without who your life and your cat’s life will be better. If the latter takes precedence, rehome your cat. There are no other alternatives because you already know his mind — its only a matter of time before he seriously injures or even *kills* your cat. Think about how you’ll feel then…. "I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday," That is the very *least* of your problems with Angelo. You need to get rid of him. Some problems can’t be corrected – only eliminated. I had a very similar problem with an *ex* wife… My cats are still here – and their now calm and happy…. she isn’t. Thus, I’m not suggesting anything I haven’t or wouldn’t do myself. I talk it like I walk it. My first loyalty and responsibility are to my cats because their lives are entrusted to me.
Response:
It sounds like Angelo is being abusive to the cats in the household when no one else is around. The spitting and hissing behavior can be an indication of this. When cats simply don’t like someone, they usually just avoid being petted by that person. I don’t know what sort of interview process went on before Angelo moved in, but he’s obviously a person who doesn’t care for cats and, therefore, should have been passed over for a roommate considering there are cats in the household. The best outcome here would be for Angelo to find a more compatible place to live and for you to find a more compatible roommate. My expectation would be that Angelo will continue to be unkind to the cats in the household when no one is looking no matter what he says when you talk to him. People may say or promise anything, but their basic character never changes. Bill
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
How exactly is this man disciplining the cats??? Is he abusing them? I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
Have you had her checked out by a vet to rule out a physical cause? These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress.
If this were me, I would get a new roommate and immediately. Who knows what this man is doing to your cat when you’re not there 
Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
Response:
I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease.
I agree, you need to get away from this guy pronto. You may even want to consider getting a personal protection order. This can usually be accomplished yourself without having to hire an attorney. You can call your county’s circuit court and inquire about it. This guy sounds like a loose cannon. Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
Response:
I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
I will tell you, as someone who has been in the criminal justice system for 25 years, that Angelo is an abusive, hostile, and possibly dangerous person. There is a definite link between abusing animals and abusing people. The most common characteristic of serial killers is bedwetting at a late age and abusing animals. I would never live under the same roof with anyone who was abusive to animals. I would get away from Angelo as quickly as I could. Furthermore, what gives him the right to do anything to or with your property (your cat) without your permission? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
You need to get away from this man ASAP. If he dared lay his hands on someone else’s cat, god knows what he’s doing when ya’ll aren’t home… Peace, Pen
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
I agree, get him outta there! Both you and the other roommate should be together on this, esp since he is being cruel to the other roommate’s cat. If you can’t get him out immediately, can you two keep the cats at a friend or relative’s house? If you can’t do that, then keep the cats in your respective bedrooms with the doors locked while you are not home. I would never, ever live with someone who was mean to an animal. If you and the other roommate can’t afford the apartment without a third person, ask around to see if friends can help you make up the difference. I know you might feel embarrassed asking for money, but if you explained the situation, I’m sure people would be happy to help. -Kelly — Are you really bored? Check out my site www.snittens.com!
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
I agree. Boot the guy out. Who knows what he does to the cat when you aren’t there? Perhaps the cat is trying to tell you. When I was a kid, my Mom and I needed to live with another person for a little while. That woman abused her dog. When my dog started pissing in the floor when anyone walked in, I knew she was abusing my dog, too. That woman ruined my dog. Took over a year for the poor thing to trust people besides me and Mom. Even then, she was never the same. Get rid of Angelo. — ~kaeli~ visit me at http://home.att.net/~infinite.possibilities
Response:
Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
Satellite’s reaction tells me that it is likely she has already suffered abuse at the hands of your roommate, and add to that that Angelo has NO BUSINESS disciplining ANY cat in your household. I am mystified as to why you and your roommate have allowed him to stay, when, from your description, it is apparent that he is abusive towards cats and you have already witnessed uncalled for behavior. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
She absolutely should still be given the benefit of the doubt. It is obvious she’s trying to tell you something. These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out.
Yes, she is, and it is likely she is suffering abuse at the hands of Angelo when you’re not around…more than you know. Often innappropriate elimination or aggressive behaviors exhibited by animals and children are a cry for help, and is in many instances the only way they know how to send a message. I believe Satellite is doing just that. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper.
Yes it is, and I’m surprised, from your description, that you would even expect that "he" could clean up the cat poop. This is obviously not a man that would, and arguing with him about it is only going to make him resent you AND your cat. Not a good thing. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
This goes WAY beyond "talking" with Angelo. You’ve been a long time member of this group and I guess I just am really confused as to why you need to ask what to do? The answer is obvious. Angelo has to go. Today. Not just for the safety of the cats, but of you and your roommate as well. I realize this may not be possible to do quickly, but your other option, and one which I hope you act on immediately, is to find a 2 person apartment that you and your other roommate can afford together, WITHOUT that animal abusing bastard. In the meantime, I would advise that you and your other roommate both have deadbolt locks installed on the doors of your rooms, put the cats in your locked rooms when you are not home, and NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER allow Angelo to be alone with the cats. EVER. Get him out of there or move. QUICKLY. Your and the cats’ safety depend on it. Megan "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -Edmund Burke Learn The TRUTH About Declawing http://www.stopdeclaw.com Zuzu’s Cats Photo Album: http://www.PictureTrail.com/zuzu22
Response:
Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. Thanks in advance. -Jen
Jen, I agree with the others who suggested that either you or Angelo should move. In addition to the obvious trauma for your cat, I would like to suggest another potential problem. That is, people who abuse animals often abuse other people at a later date. So it might be a good idea for you to move on, for your own protection as well as for your cat’s safety. I realize that there are many people who have been brought up to (incorrectly) think that it is alright to "rub a cat’s (or dog’s) nose in it," but I think I detect in your letter an inference that there are also other abusive tendencies here. MaryL
Response:
Yep, I agree – you need to talk with (to?!) Angelo. And what about your other roommate? Is s/he also having a problem w/ Angelo & his/her cat? Do you think there’s any chance that Angelo could change w/ his attitude/behavior, or is it well-ingrained? I suppose if you’d prefer to give Angelo the boot, rather than deal w/ him being around & stressing Satellite out, that it needs to be discussed first w/ your other roomie? In the meantime, I might make a vet appt. just in case there’s something medical going on, but it does sound as if Angelo’s the root of the problem. Cathy — "Staccato signals of constant information…" ("The Boy in the Bubble") Paul Simon
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated.
I think I’d run, don’t walk away from Angelo. I could never live with anyone who shows so little compassion for animals. I think you’re exactly right — the real issue is probably much deeper. Your cat is showing classic symptoms of being under terrible stress. She is screaming for help. Sherry
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<< I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. I agree with Karen. I would be more than talking with Angelo, I’d be booting his ass outta there. How do you know he doesn’t do mean things to those cats when you’re not around? You’re a long time poster on this NG; I’m surprised you would tolerate this behavior in this guy. I think it’s dangerous for the cats to have a cat-hater around. I think it’s pointless to try to change Satellite’s behavior as long as this person is around. Candace (take the litter out before replying by e-mail) See my cats: http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
Response:
Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
You don’t need to talk to Angelo — you need to throw the bastard the hell out — but not before rubbing *his* nose in some cat poop before he seriously injures, cripples, or kills your cat. Your cat is under *severe* stress and terror and *screaming* for help — He’s literally scaring the shit of your cat. Connect the dots: * "Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat." * "I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat," * "I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room". * "Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Ray Charles could make the connection. There is *nothing* wrong with your cat that won’t resolve immediately with his departure.. You must decide which is more important – your *obligation* and *responsibility* to a feeling, helpless, trusting, sensitive creature who has entrusted you with her safety and very life or the "friendship" of an insensitive asshole without who your life and your cat’s life will be better. If the latter takes precedence, rehome your cat. There are no other alternatives because you already know his mind — its only a matter of time before he seriously injures or even *kills* your cat. Think about how you’ll feel then…. "I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday," That is the very *least* of your problems with Angelo. You need to get rid of him. Some problems can’t be corrected – only eliminated. I had a very similar problem with an *ex* wife… My cats are still here – and their now calm and happy…. she isn’t. Thus, I’m not suggesting anything I haven’t or wouldn’t do myself. I talk it like I walk it. My first loyalty and responsibility are to my cats because their lives are entrusted to me.
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It sounds like Angelo is being abusive to the cats in the household when no one else is around. The spitting and hissing behavior can be an indication of this. When cats simply don’t like someone, they usually just avoid being petted by that person. I don’t know what sort of interview process went on before Angelo moved in, but he’s obviously a person who doesn’t care for cats and, therefore, should have been passed over for a roommate considering there are cats in the household. The best outcome here would be for Angelo to find a more compatible place to live and for you to find a more compatible roommate. My expectation would be that Angelo will continue to be unkind to the cats in the household when no one is looking no matter what he says when you talk to him. People may say or promise anything, but their basic character never changes. Bill
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
How exactly is this man disciplining the cats??? Is he abusing them? I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
Have you had her checked out by a vet to rule out a physical cause? These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress.
If this were me, I would get a new roommate and immediately. Who knows what this man is doing to your cat when you’re not there Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
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I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease.
I agree, you need to get away from this guy pronto. You may even want to consider getting a personal protection order. This can usually be accomplished yourself without having to hire an attorney. You can call your county’s circuit court and inquire about it. This guy sounds like a loose cannon. Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
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I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I will tell you, as someone who has been in the criminal justice system for 25 years, that Angelo is an abusive, hostile, and possibly dangerous person. There is a definite link between abusing animals and abusing people. The most common characteristic of serial killers is bedwetting at a late age and abusing animals. I would never live under the same roof with anyone who was abusive to animals. I would get away from Angelo as quickly as I could. Furthermore, what gives him the right to do anything to or with your property (your cat) without your permission? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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You need to get away from this man ASAP. If he dared lay his hands on someone else’s cat, god knows what he’s doing when ya’ll aren’t home… Peace, Pen
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I agree, get him outta there! Both you and the other roommate should be together on this, esp since he is being cruel to the other roommate’s cat. If you can’t get him out immediately, can you two keep the cats at a friend or relative’s house? If you can’t do that, then keep the cats in your respective bedrooms with the doors locked while you are not home. I would never, ever live with someone who was mean to an animal. If you and the other roommate can’t afford the apartment without a third person, ask around to see if friends can help you make up the difference. I know you might feel embarrassed asking for money, but if you explained the situation, I’m sure people would be happy to help. -Kelly — Are you really bored? Check out my site www.snittens.com!
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
I agree. Boot the guy out. Who knows what he does to the cat when you aren’t there? Perhaps the cat is trying to tell you. When I was a kid, my Mom and I needed to live with another person for a little while. That woman abused her dog. When my dog started pissing in the floor when anyone walked in, I knew she was abusing my dog, too. That woman ruined my dog. Took over a year for the poor thing to trust people besides me and Mom. Even then, she was never the same. Get rid of Angelo. — ~kaeli~ visit me at http://home.att.net/~infinite.possibilities
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
Satellite’s reaction tells me that it is likely she has already suffered abuse at the hands of your roommate, and add to that that Angelo has NO BUSINESS disciplining ANY cat in your household. I am mystified as to why you and your roommate have allowed him to stay, when, from your description, it is apparent that he is abusive towards cats and you have already witnessed uncalled for behavior. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
She absolutely should still be given the benefit of the doubt. It is obvious she’s trying to tell you something. These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out.
Yes, she is, and it is likely she is suffering abuse at the hands of Angelo when you’re not around…more than you know. Often innappropriate elimination or aggressive behaviors exhibited by animals and children are a cry for help, and is in many instances the only way they know how to send a message. I believe Satellite is doing just that. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper.
Yes it is, and I’m surprised, from your description, that you would even expect that "he" could clean up the cat poop. This is obviously not a man that would, and arguing with him about it is only going to make him resent you AND your cat. Not a good thing. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
This goes WAY beyond "talking" with Angelo. You’ve been a long time member of this group and I guess I just am really confused as to why you need to ask what to do? The answer is obvious. Angelo has to go. Today. Not just for the safety of the cats, but of you and your roommate as well. I realize this may not be possible to do quickly, but your other option, and one which I hope you act on immediately, is to find a 2 person apartment that you and your other roommate can afford together, WITHOUT that animal abusing bastard. In the meantime, I would advise that you and your other roommate both have deadbolt locks installed on the doors of your rooms, put the cats in your locked rooms when you are not home, and NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER allow Angelo to be alone with the cats. EVER. Get him out of there or move. QUICKLY. Your and the cats’ safety depend on it. Megan "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -Edmund Burke Learn The TRUTH About Declawing http://www.stopdeclaw.com Zuzu’s Cats Photo Album: http://www.PictureTrail.com/zuzu22
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. Thanks in advance. -Jen
Jen, I agree with the others who suggested that either you or Angelo should move. In addition to the obvious trauma for your cat, I would like to suggest another potential problem. That is, people who abuse animals often abuse other people at a later date. So it might be a good idea for you to move on, for your own protection as well as for your cat’s safety. I realize that there are many people who have been brought up to (incorrectly) think that it is alright to "rub a cat’s (or dog’s) nose in it," but I think I detect in your letter an inference that there are also other abusive tendencies here. MaryL
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Yep, I agree – you need to talk with (to?!) Angelo. And what about your other roommate? Is s/he also having a problem w/ Angelo & his/her cat? Do you think there’s any chance that Angelo could change w/ his attitude/behavior, or is it well-ingrained? I suppose if you’d prefer to give Angelo the boot, rather than deal w/ him being around & stressing Satellite out, that it needs to be discussed first w/ your other roomie? In the meantime, I might make a vet appt. just in case there’s something medical going on, but it does sound as if Angelo’s the root of the problem. Cathy — "Staccato signals of constant information…" ("The Boy in the Bubble") Paul Simon
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated.
I think I’d run, don’t walk away from Angelo. I could never live with anyone who shows so little compassion for animals. I think you’re exactly right — the real issue is probably much deeper. Your cat is showing classic symptoms of being under terrible stress. She is screaming for help. Sherry
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<< I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. I agree with Karen. I would be more than talking with Angelo, I’d be booting his ass outta there. How do you know he doesn’t do mean things to those cats when you’re not around? You’re a long time poster on this NG; I’m surprised you would tolerate this behavior in this guy. I think it’s dangerous for the cats to have a cat-hater around. I think it’s pointless to try to change Satellite’s behavior as long as this person is around. Candace (take the litter out before replying by e-mail) See my cats: http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
You don’t need to talk to Angelo — you need to throw the bastard the hell out — but not before rubbing *his* nose in some cat poop before he seriously injures, cripples, or kills your cat. Your cat is under *severe* stress and terror and *screaming* for help — He’s literally scaring the shit of your cat. Connect the dots: * "Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat." * "I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat," * "I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room". * "Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Ray Charles could make the connection. There is *nothing* wrong with your cat that won’t resolve immediately with his departure.. You must decide which is more important – your *obligation* and *responsibility* to a feeling, helpless, trusting, sensitive creature who has entrusted you with her safety and very life or the "friendship" of an insensitive asshole without who your life and your cat’s life will be better. If the latter takes precedence, rehome your cat. There are no other alternatives because you already know his mind — its only a matter of time before he seriously injures or even *kills* your cat. Think about how you’ll feel then…. "I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday," That is the very *least* of your problems with Angelo. You need to get rid of him. Some problems can’t be corrected – only eliminated. I had a very similar problem with an *ex* wife… My cats are still here – and their now calm and happy…. she isn’t. Thus, I’m not suggesting anything I haven’t or wouldn’t do myself. I talk it like I walk it. My first loyalty and responsibility are to my cats because their lives are entrusted to me.
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It sounds like Angelo is being abusive to the cats in the household when no one else is around. The spitting and hissing behavior can be an indication of this. When cats simply don’t like someone, they usually just avoid being petted by that person. I don’t know what sort of interview process went on before Angelo moved in, but he’s obviously a person who doesn’t care for cats and, therefore, should have been passed over for a roommate considering there are cats in the household. The best outcome here would be for Angelo to find a more compatible place to live and for you to find a more compatible roommate. My expectation would be that Angelo will continue to be unkind to the cats in the household when no one is looking no matter what he says when you talk to him. People may say or promise anything, but their basic character never changes. Bill
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
How exactly is this man disciplining the cats??? Is he abusing them? I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
Have you had her checked out by a vet to rule out a physical cause? These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress.
If this were me, I would get a new roommate and immediately. Who knows what this man is doing to your cat when you’re not there Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
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I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease.
I agree, you need to get away from this guy pronto. You may even want to consider getting a personal protection order. This can usually be accomplished yourself without having to hire an attorney. You can call your county’s circuit court and inquire about it. This guy sounds like a loose cannon. Lauren =^..^= See my cats: http://www.picturetrail.com/mickey4paws/703043 To Error is Human, To be Purrfect is Feline
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I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I will tell you, as someone who has been in the criminal justice system for 25 years, that Angelo is an abusive, hostile, and possibly dangerous person. There is a definite link between abusing animals and abusing people. The most common characteristic of serial killers is bedwetting at a late age and abusing animals. I would never live under the same roof with anyone who was abusive to animals. I would get away from Angelo as quickly as I could. Furthermore, what gives him the right to do anything to or with your property (your cat) without your permission? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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You need to get away from this man ASAP. If he dared lay his hands on someone else’s cat, god knows what he’s doing when ya’ll aren’t home… Peace, Pen
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I agree, get him outta there! Both you and the other roommate should be together on this, esp since he is being cruel to the other roommate’s cat. If you can’t get him out immediately, can you two keep the cats at a friend or relative’s house? If you can’t do that, then keep the cats in your respective bedrooms with the doors locked while you are not home. I would never, ever live with someone who was mean to an animal. If you and the other roommate can’t afford the apartment without a third person, ask around to see if friends can help you make up the difference. I know you might feel embarrassed asking for money, but if you explained the situation, I’m sure people would be happy to help. -Kelly — Are you really bored? Check out my site www.snittens.com!
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I’m going to echo the others here. One of you should move. Ideally, it should be the one who moved in last, unless your other roommate wants him gone also. Of course, another consideration is who is on the lease. But if your cat is acting out this way, especially around him, it means there’s something funky going on. Protect your cat, and, as another poster pointed out, yourself. Good luck, and sorry you’re in this situation. Karen M. Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
I agree. Boot the guy out. Who knows what he does to the cat when you aren’t there? Perhaps the cat is trying to tell you. When I was a kid, my Mom and I needed to live with another person for a little while. That woman abused her dog. When my dog started pissing in the floor when anyone walked in, I knew she was abusing my dog, too. That woman ruined my dog. Took over a year for the poor thing to trust people besides me and Mom. Even then, she was never the same. Get rid of Angelo. — ~kaeli~ visit me at http://home.att.net/~infinite.possibilities
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room.
Satellite’s reaction tells me that it is likely she has already suffered abuse at the hands of your roommate, and add to that that Angelo has NO BUSINESS disciplining ANY cat in your household. I am mystified as to why you and your roommate have allowed him to stay, when, from your description, it is apparent that he is abusive towards cats and you have already witnessed uncalled for behavior. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before).
She absolutely should still be given the benefit of the doubt. It is obvious she’s trying to tell you something. These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out.
Yes, she is, and it is likely she is suffering abuse at the hands of Angelo when you’re not around…more than you know. Often innappropriate elimination or aggressive behaviors exhibited by animals and children are a cry for help, and is in many instances the only way they know how to send a message. I believe Satellite is doing just that. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper.
Yes it is, and I’m surprised, from your description, that you would even expect that "he" could clean up the cat poop. This is obviously not a man that would, and arguing with him about it is only going to make him resent you AND your cat. Not a good thing. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.)
This goes WAY beyond "talking" with Angelo. You’ve been a long time member of this group and I guess I just am really confused as to why you need to ask what to do? The answer is obvious. Angelo has to go. Today. Not just for the safety of the cats, but of you and your roommate as well. I realize this may not be possible to do quickly, but your other option, and one which I hope you act on immediately, is to find a 2 person apartment that you and your other roommate can afford together, WITHOUT that animal abusing bastard. In the meantime, I would advise that you and your other roommate both have deadbolt locks installed on the doors of your rooms, put the cats in your locked rooms when you are not home, and NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER allow Angelo to be alone with the cats. EVER. Get him out of there or move. QUICKLY. Your and the cats’ safety depend on it. Megan "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -Edmund Burke Learn The TRUTH About Declawing http://www.stopdeclaw.com Zuzu’s Cats Photo Album: http://www.PictureTrail.com/zuzu22
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. Thanks in advance. -Jen
Jen, I agree with the others who suggested that either you or Angelo should move. In addition to the obvious trauma for your cat, I would like to suggest another potential problem. That is, people who abuse animals often abuse other people at a later date. So it might be a good idea for you to move on, for your own protection as well as for your cat’s safety. I realize that there are many people who have been brought up to (incorrectly) think that it is alright to "rub a cat’s (or dog’s) nose in it," but I think I detect in your letter an inference that there are also other abusive tendencies here. MaryL
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Yep, I agree – you need to talk with (to?!) Angelo. And what about your other roommate? Is s/he also having a problem w/ Angelo & his/her cat? Do you think there’s any chance that Angelo could change w/ his attitude/behavior, or is it well-ingrained? I suppose if you’d prefer to give Angelo the boot, rather than deal w/ him being around & stressing Satellite out, that it needs to be discussed first w/ your other roomie? In the meantime, I might make a vet appt. just in case there’s something medical going on, but it does sound as if Angelo’s the root of the problem. Cathy — "Staccato signals of constant information…" ("The Boy in the Bubble") Paul Simon
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated.
I think I’d run, don’t walk away from Angelo. I could never live with anyone who shows so little compassion for animals. I think you’re exactly right — the real issue is probably much deeper. Your cat is showing classic symptoms of being under terrible stress. She is screaming for help. Sherry
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<< I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. I agree with Karen. I would be more than talking with Angelo, I’d be booting his ass outta there. How do you know he doesn’t do mean things to those cats when you’re not around? You’re a long time poster on this NG; I’m surprised you would tolerate this behavior in this guy. I think it’s dangerous for the cats to have a cat-hater around. I think it’s pointless to try to change Satellite’s behavior as long as this person is around. Candace (take the litter out before replying by e-mail) See my cats: http://photos.yahoo.com/maccandace
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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
I’m very sorry, but if it were me, either *I* would be gone or *Angelo* would be gone. I would certainly not trust him around my cat!!!!!!! That is outrageous, OUTRAGEOUS, that he would dare discipline another persons cat in such a way. And for WHAT??? I’m sorry but this peeves me. Your cat may also be very well developing physical problems related to this stress. I know moving is not easy and I don’t know who was there first but I would NOT let him NEAR my cat. Karen
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Sigh….my cat Satellite, who is a VERY good cat, is starting to have inappropriate elimination problems. This has never happened before, and she has lived with many a cat or dog and she always adjusts easily. This time, however, I believe she is afraid of my roommate. This roommate, Angelo, is a large man who seems to think mercenary punishment is an appropriate way to train a cat. I’ve seen him discipline my other roommate’s cat, and I’ve seen Satellite hiss and spit when Angelo has walked into my room. I just returned from a vacation and found that she had pooped on my down comforter! I would give her the benefit of the doubt if it weren’t for the fact that this is now the second time she’s done it since I lived here (and it’s never happened before). These two times are the only times she’s ever done this, and I’m putting two and two together now. I think that when I’m not home, she gets very stressed and she is acting out. Ironically, Angelo suggested that I "rub her nose in it and tell her she’s bad." Anyone with a cat knows that this is not generally effective and can cause even more stress. And I believe that it’s this attitude which is causing the problem in the first place. I’m seriously angry with Angelo for not bothering to clean up the poop that apparently appeared yesterday, and I’m arguing with him about this, but I think the REAL issue is a little deeper. Does anyone have experience with this? Suggestions would be appreciated. (And I already know that I need to talk with Angelo.) Thanks in advance. -Jen If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
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>> I’ll be playing a British butler who goes around asking incredibly >> technical gun questions of people while they are hunting or shooting >> at a range. >LOL! A guy from a totally gun free country (but not gun crime free..) asking >about guns! This is like having a Muslin in a bacon ad! 
I liked your suggestions and have used them too, but two of my kids were hyperactive and the only thing that worked without conflict was nursing them to sleep. I know it’s not the answer for most families, but I still wanted to remind people that it is another option. > I did nurse my kids…one was a 10 pounder at birth who was the size of a 3 > month old. by 6 months he pushed me away and that was it. > he plays high school football now… 