The living death????
Question:
Hi Greg, yes I’m back. It’s so good to see you on the ng and your message is right on!!! Talk to you soon. Lots of Love Vikki
Response:
In article <926454682.992…@news.remarQ.com>, "Jo" <jl…@zoomnet.net> wrote: > > gregh, in many ways I do agree with you. Very seldomly is OSA an > IMMEDIATE > > threat to life and limb. But rather like a touchy gun, you just don’t > know > > when it’ll go off … even fatally so. No, it’s not a heart attack. > Yes, > > we can wait for our sleep studies. But yes, we need to consider > management > > of OSA as important as management of diabetes. > My ENT thought my apnea was so life-threatening for me that he > called me the very next day after my sleep study and told me that I > needed to be on CPAP right away.
Same here; however my employers had not filed my insurance properly so I had to wait a week!
Response:
REP <r…@inanna.com> wrote in message
news:rep-ya02408000R1105991955270001@news.pacbell.net… > Same here; however my employers had not filed my insurance properly so I > had to wait a week!
Back in 1990 before I knew I had sleep apnea, I badly smashed my knee requiring reconstruction BUT because I was a stubborn type and had not long started the sales job I had, I kept walking on it. It kept popping sideways out of socket and I kept falling flat on my face in the middle of the street. My boss didnt really find out about it until I was on my way downstairs and when it popped out, leaving me hanging on to dear life on the bannister. He was a BIG strong guy and picked me up with one hand and held me while I popped my knee back to where it should be and then put me down. At that point, he started saying that I had to go home, find out what had to be done and not come back to work until I could tell him what the doc said. 4 days later I told him the doc said it needed reconstruction and I had to have it. I got the sack. So, in short, you guys are lucky in that way. Over here if that had have happened OUTSIDE of the initial 3 months to me, I would have been able to sue but inside the 3 months as I was and because I didnt do it in working hours, I "didnt have a leg to stand on", legally. Same goes for Sleep Apnea. — Remove the anti-spammer stuff
Response:
> gregh, in many ways I do agree with you. Very seldomly is OSA an IMMEDIATE > threat to life and limb. But rather like a touchy gun, you just don’t know > when it’ll go off … even fatally so. No, it’s not a heart attack. Yes, > we can wait for our sleep studies. But yes, we need to consider management > of OSA as important as management of diabetes.
My ENT thought my apnea was so life-threatening for me that he called me the very next day after my sleep study and told me that I needed to be on CPAP right away. I turned him down because I was stupid, rebellious, and scared. Thank heaven he HAD to report me to the Department of Transportation as a threat to everyone’s safety on the road and subsequently my driving privileges in Ontario were suspended. That got my attention and I went in for the titration study which couldn’t be scheduled for another three months. (Hmmm, if my apnea was THAT serious you woulda thought he have gotten me in there as soon as I called him back.) So, some doctors may come across heavy-handed about this disorder and rightly so since there are so many people who don’t comply with the treatment. I thought my life as I knew it was finished when I had to bring that machine home and start using it. I threatened to let it sit in the corner turned on for the required 8 hours and not use. How could they tell if I used it or not? Yes, the counter was turning but they couldn’t tell if it was really on my face or not. The doctor admitted that. Oh, yes, I was rebellious. But deep down, I wondered what it was like to sleep all the way through the night and feel refreshed. And I had a deeper yearning to have my new husband sleeping in the same room with me so I vowed to use it for a month. I was surprised when within one week I was feeling so much better that I knew I couldn’t sleep without it. My rebellion melted very quickly along with my resentments. No doubt about it, my life would have been in deep danger if I hadn’t kept on using that machine. It doesn’t kill overnight but one of those night, I might have not wakened up and no one could tell me for sure just which night. Like John said, you never know when that touchy gun will go off. I still haven’t lost weight from being on CPAP, and I still haven’t been able to rid myself of the mild depression I’ve always had but at least I am managing my apnea by continuing to use the machine which I have grown to love. I told my husband just lately, in the wake of the killer tornadoes in Oklahoma and all, that if we get a tornado alert here in Ohio, I’m grabbing my machine first before I head down the steps. Jo
Response:
Bret Wood <bretw…@cs.uoregon.edu> wrote in message
news:37370453.BC64F594@cs.uoregon.edu… > Anyway, he closed his "mini-sermon" by saying that we each have our > own cross to bear, even though it may not be visible to the rest of > the world.
Brett, A good answer, in fact. My own father was raised in outback Queensland during the 30s depression as one of 11 surviving children, being the second youngest, the eldest being 26 when he was born. He had next to nothing for Xmas (he remembers one year each kid getting a water pistol and couldnt believe how great Xmas was) and didnt get any schooling after turning 12 because he had to support the family by droving stock, broken arms or legs or not and also painting houses when there was no droving work to be had. He joined the Army in 1946 when he was finally of legal age and ended up in Japan witht he occupation forces and SAW Hiroshima and people with fused hands and what looked like melted body parts really happy to get something at ALL from him. He is a tough guy yet he said he had trouble keeping himself from crying for them, seeing that. With no schooling, after getting out of the Army, he went from a labourer to eventually 3rd in charge of the entire company he worked for, some 2 years after having worked for an asbestos rock grinding company in the 50s who gave them asbestos rock to grind to dust without any form of protection. Naturally he has asbestosis nowadays. He is in his 70s and takes what he says are "old people" who are people around his age and in some cases younger, on outings. These people are physically infirmed but able to walk a short distance. In all this, he still says he hasnt a thing to complain about in the way his life was laid out before him. I dont know how he does it but you know if I make it to 25% like him, I think I have achieved SOMETHING good! We all just need to remember the good things in our lives. Dont lose sight of them or the responsibilities we have to others, be they human or pet. Dont EVER let them down. NO QUITTING. I am not a really religious person but I like your priest already! ;-} — Remove the anti-spammer stuff
Response:
Since I was the person who wrote those exact words, I feel I should respond. I had an RDI of 60 before UPPP. I shuffled through 2 years of work, accomplishing basically nothing. It was only my reputation and the brief moments of lucidity that kept me around that long. My house and potentially my marriage were falling down around my ears. My associations outside of work were nonexistent. Maybe I was being overly dramatic, but it was no kind of life. Perhaps the death was more one of spirit than anything. But I felt reborn after the surgery. I try not to compare myself with others. I strive for continuous self improvement in everything I do. This is the only measure of self that I know. For two years there was none. I felt like I was dying even if I wasn’t. Jon – Sorry if I was over the top. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -gregh wrote: > Hi all, > Well there sure is one thing I think we need to address in here. Sleep Apnea > is a big problem as we all know but a living death? Let’s get things in > perspective. If you have ONLY sleep apnea: > 1) Do you have a terminal health problem that causes excruciating pain? > 2) Do you have a terminal health problem that robs you of your dignity? > 3) Do you lose all your friends and family just BECAUSE of sleep apnea and > basically end up pushing a shopping cart ont he streets looking for a trash > bin to live in at night? > If you answered no to those, you arent experiencing "LIVING DEATH".
Response:
gregh wrote:
<good post snipped> It seems that every person considers their personal trials to be worse than everyone elses. I think it’s just a characteristic of human nature. But it does help to realize that even though it may _feel_ like no-one else could possibly understand the terrible situation you/me/he/she are forced to deal with, in fact many people are dealing with situations just as bad, or worse, which _we_ have no concept of. Life is hard for many people. Sleep disorders are a really nasty thing to deal with. But as you point out, they aren’t the worst problem in the world. A while back I went to a priest, and ended up complaining about the state of my life. (sleep disorder, mental illness, child with autism, etc.) He then proceeded to mention the situations of a couple of other people in the same parish who were dealing with situations just as bad as mine, or worse. (he didn’t name the people of course. :) Anyway, he closed his "mini-sermon" by saying that we each have our own cross to bear, even though it may not be visible to the rest of the world. -Bret Wood -bretw…@cs.uoregon.edu
Response:
Hi all, osa is different for everyone. That is very clear on this ng. But for me, I went pretty close to dying if I didn’t get my cpap. That’s how it was with me. I did not go to get a sleep study cause of snoring. I slept alone for over 8 years so there was nobody to hear how I was not breathing. My husband had to leave my bedroom years ago, as he needed to get his sleep so he can work a regular day job .. I, on the otherhand, could not only work anymore….I couldn’t sleep anymore. If my husband did hear my sleep, he thought I was in a good deep sleep, ignorant of any sleep disorders. It wasn’t part of our vocabulary. I blamed my not being able to sleep on taking alot of prozac (6, 20 mil per day), menapause, oh, depression, you name it; but did not know anything about sleep disorders. I believed they were for men, not woman. I kept increasing my prozac dozage as I felt like I was going nuts during the day. Dropping things, falling down stairs, off chairs, having to walk with a cane ( I am in mid 50’s now and a real young one at that), and at night, if I could finally fall asleep, I would wake up screaming bloody murder, soaking wet, hallucinating, night tremors, choking like nobody’s business, hyperventilating; and oh so much more, but thankfully I foget alot of it. It’s not something I want to keep in my memory, believe me. So I went to a mental hosptal, after I wet the bed one night, and belived because I could not get more than 15 minutes sleep without awaking feeling nuts, i truly had gone mad. Maddness is not in my family, although there is depression. But I have been cronically depressed my entire life, and this feeling of loosing it was nothing which resembles depression, except I just didn’t want to live anymore if I couldn’t get some uninterrupted sleep. when I checked into the sleep center at the hospital, I told them that I could not sleep and feared that I had just gone off the deep end. the nurse talked about sleep apnea, but didn’;t even listen…was too tired, cranky, scared, and hyper about finally hoping to get some help. I was put to bed at around 11 with all those awful wires and layed in a small dark room (as if I didn’t feel nuts, already, they put me in this awful empty room which would make anyone feel uncomfortable even if they had no problems.) I layed there until 4am in the morning at which time she came in and put a cpap on me. Oh, I thought I will try anything at this point as I was so exhausted and sad that I hadn’t even slept a wink. Well, the cpap, the miracle for me that it is, relaxed me, and I slept for 2 solid hours, upon which time she awoke me and said that she got the info she needed. When I awoke, I felt like a ten year old kid in summer camp…..so happy, so relieved I guess cause I was breathing for the first time in years, and so grateful to be alive and having two hours uninterrupted sleep. The story goes from there…don’t want to hog the entire ng here, but I tell you, it’s been 2 years for me on cpap, and my life has remarkably changed. Maybe nothing that would impress anyone, as I haven’t lost any weight, or been able to work, or on and on and on; but I do breathe when I sleep at night, and belive me that is the biggest gift I ever did receive. I guess it’s next to giving birth to my kids in my lifetime expreriences. Right now, I am trying to get off prozac, and I have my fingers crossed about that. But, I do value my wonderful sleep and as I said at the beginning everyone here on this ng has their own story. So maybe for some, it doesn’t feel life threatening….but for me, it does. That’s it for now. Deb
Response:
gregh wrote about his concern that too many of us were taking OSA as something that’s life threatening … gregh, in many ways I do agree with you. Very seldomly is OSA an IMMEDIATE threat to life and limb. But rather like a touchy gun, you just don’t know when it’ll go off … even fatally so. No, it’s not a heart attack. Yes, we can wait for our sleep studies. But yes, we need to consider management of OSA as important as management of diabetes. And I must say, I tend to agree whole heartedly with your approach to living. Though I personally am driven by my own beliefs, were I not, I think would still try to take a positive outlook. Why? Because it works. My own beliefs make very difficult times easier. Regards, =jbf= John B. Fisher
Response:
gregh wrote: > I am not a really religious person but I like your priest already! ;-}
I know this is a bit off topic, but that is one of the things I _really_ like about the Catholic practice of confessing sins to a Priest. It makes it so that there are some people in the world who _really_ know what human nature is like, not just the front we all put on. Good priests tend to have some amazing insights into what it means to be a person, and what we all have in common, whether we like it or not. :) -Bret Wood -bretw…@cs.uoregon.edu
Response:
Mrs. Duck wrote her own story, then noted: > … don’t want to hog the entire ng here, but I tell you, it’s > been 2 years for me on cpap, and my life has remarkably > changed. … So maybe for some, it doesn’t feel life > threatening….but for me, it does.
Deb, thanks for sharing your story. It can be hard to do that. And no, you are not hogging the entire newsgroup. Sharing our own stories is essential to help others understand they are not alone. Nor are they all that unusual in how they face those problems. But I think the intent was not whether it was ‘life threatening’ as much as it IMMEDIATELY threatens life. Obstructive Sleep Apnea does not (usually) immediately threaten life and limb. But it sure can make life miserable and eventually even threaten life. But most of us can wait for a sleep study. (Not all the ‘usuals’ — the point is that any chronic illness CAN reach the point that it becomes immediately life threatening.) In other words, I think you are in agreement with the original poster. You were both just defining the words slightly differently. Regards, =jbf= John B. Fisher
Response:
Hi all, Well there sure is one thing I think we need to address in here. Sleep Apnea is a big problem as we all know but a living death? Let’s get things in perspective. If you have ONLY sleep apnea: 1) Do you have a terminal health problem that causes excruciating pain? 2) Do you have a terminal health problem that robs you of your dignity? 3) Do you lose all your friends and family just BECAUSE of sleep apnea and basically end up pushing a shopping cart ont he streets looking for a trash bin to live in at night? If you answered no to those, you arent experiencing "LIVING DEATH". We all have a problem that causes lack of oxygen, angina in a heart that isnt damaged and no artery blockages, lack of abilities and loss of memory as well as depression but we arent DEAD nor are we suffering like 7 year old kids who have cancer, kids that are so young that they really havent had a chance to be good or bad yet – just naughty. So, while things arent going so well for YOU right now, take a minute to remember what age you are and ask yourself if that 7 year old would like to change health problems with you and have the chance to live to your age. In short, dont keep looking for the negatives because you will ALWAYS find them. Try looking for the positives. They are harder to find for some of us but they are there anyway. No, I am not ultra religious or on some sort of high. I am no teacher of the depressed, either. I am just a human trying to find his way but each time I start trying to find an excuse, it’s there. Sleep Apnea stops you from doing many things but it doesnt stop you from putting life in perspective. If you think you have it hard with sleep apnea, remember the young kids who wont make it to your age to read anything at all. Dont hold me up as an idiot or a saint because I am neither. I just try as hard as I can to see why I have it good and I kiss my wife every night and tell her that I am lucky to have her because I am. I also cuddle my dogs and gently stroke my cat (you dont do it any other way or she gets shitty and claws you. ;-}) and thank THEM for being who they are so I can think about something else other than ME, too. Try it sometime. It isnt an ultimate answer but it certainly helps your perspective. — Remove the anti-spammer stuff
