WHY?? What in the World??
Question:
Alan Moorman wrote me in response to my recent post (see The Travln’ John post): What in the world???? Why would you even think about having more than one service????
Another unasked question would be what am I doing posting in this group???? The answers are simple: 1 My girl friend for the last 3 years was recently diagnnosed with sleep apnea. I Love her. 2 I am a 48 year old exrailroader on early disability retirement due to "complications" arising from a diagnosis of manic depres- sion. 3 An example of why I use multiple online service occurred this ` morning when I could not post to newsgroups with my primary online service, Fullnet, because I was informed that the writing device (?) was full and posting was being throttled. By switching to my secondary, CenCom Internet, I was able to make my posts without further delay (my obsession and mania making it impossible to live with the delay without becoming extremely anxiety ridden). The last time this happened my preferred online service would not allow posting for 5 days. I live with the daily knowledge of my manic depression and have determined, despite the negative aspects of my diagnosis, that being manic is not necessarily a totally bad thing to have. It is a part of who and what I am. Yes…I am on medications but prefer them balanced to the point of allowing a bit of mania to exist. It is my belief that without this bit of mania I would be totally nonfunctional. Belief?? Hell…this is a proven fact in my life. The mania keeps me functional but at times leads to certain appropriate/inappropriate actions (indulgences?). Inappropriate to the point that I will focus on something to the extreme of obsessiveness (addictions). Which explains why I spend countless sleepless hours obsessed with my computer and the internet leading up to the inappropriate monthly bills I was running up with the major online services (AOL, Compuserve and Prodigy). There were a number of times when my (then) current provider (online service) would go down and I would be unable to access the internet. I developed symptoms every bit as severe as any addict denied his addiction, anxiety bordering on panic attacks…difficulty breathing…unable to think of anything else other than my need to get back online! Thus the answer why in the world the need for more than one online service. The appropriate part is a driving need to help others (as well as myself) by searching the internet for all the info I can locate when a problem arises to better understand what is going on in our lives. I have downloaded everything I can find on manic depression which helped me come to terms with myself…concern and Love for my girl friend led me to find everything I could about sleep apnea (sleep disorders in general) to better prepare her and I in the battle against the "Phantom Strangler of the Night"…the expressed opinion that one of my grandsons may be ADD led me to find all I could about Attention Deficiency Disorder…my Dad is currently undergoing chemotherapy for colon cancer…My God! I’ll soon be able to open my own medical clinic at this rate! When I was first diagnosed bipolar (manic depressive) I went through years of denial that such a terrible thing could be wrong with me! This was due to the lack of appropriate information about this illness being provided to me. As far as I was concerned telling me I was "manic" was comparable to telling me I was acting like one of those drooling, mindless "crazy people" or like one of those "psychopaths" so popular in the media and the entertainment industry. I was most certainly NOT one of those! After the denial was sledge hammered out of me and I started on the road to "recovery", I resolved to find out all I could about this illness to better understand "who I was" (and conceivably in the hopes of finding info that would reinstate my denial and prove that nothing was wrong with me after all!!!). The knowledge gained led to a better understanding and the acceptance that I AM manic depressive and will be to the day I die…it is a part of me and will never go away. I often wonder if earlier full disclosure about exactly what manic depression is (other than the dry medical terms) would have gotten me over my self denial much sooner and prevented several years of living HELL on earth for my family. They fought a "war" for several years against my illness and my self denial (formidable opponents indeed!). Because of this I have developed a strong distaste for any individual or commercial enterprise that does not provide full disclosure of information that can help save others at least a portion of potential pain or inappropriate action(s). Thus the spamming of my previous post to over 250 groups to which I am currently a subscriber. I feel if someone was to provide info of this type (both this post about manic depression and the previous post on online services) then someone else may be spared the errors that I have made. Sorry about the rather lengthy discourse but… it’s the MANIA doncha know!!!! o Johnny Fisher o The Travln’ John | o | / . o | | ( |/ / | / |/
Response:
Traveling John, I, too, have multiple online services. Now, this one, is only $23.95 monthly, all you can eat. I am told that netcom is soon to be, 19.95 monthly, unlimited access…All You Can eat! It is aggravating as hell, encountering busy signals, mail errors, disk full errors, no answer errors, etc… I am presently considering using one of those remailing services, so that I can have all of my mail going to one address. I am told that most use these remailers for privacy too, but my main concern is to have and to maintain "one" address. aka tex
I see no real need for a remailing service…it is possible to edit the headers with each service you use so that any replies to your posting and/or e-mail will return to your preferred mail service…this can also be done in the preferences/options portion of your mail and/or news reader… As for the anonymous aspect…since I came to the acceptance of who I was with my bipolar illness and learned just what manic-depression is, I have overcome the stigmata associated with it and am very open about it…it is nothing to be ashamed of and we bipolars can be proud of the company we keep….I even wrote an article about my own manic depression in an attempt to explain to the general public exactly what this is and what it is like to be one (there is so much misconception/misinformation about this illness due to the rare and sensational negative aspects associated with manic depression and the images put forth in the entertainment industry)…this article was published in a local newspaper complete with a picture on myself and one of my grandsons… I received NO negative feedback from this and all reaction I received was complimentary…thus I continue to be open about who and what I am and refuse to hide behind the concealment of anonymity…I prefer to be recognized as a real person… o Johnny Fisher o The Travln’ John | o | / . o | | ( |/ / | / |/
Response:
Traveling John, I, too, have multiple online services. Now, this one, is only $23.95 monthly, all you can eat. I am told that netcom is soon to be, 19.95 monthly, unlimited access…All You Can eat! It is aggravating as hell, encountering busy signals, mail errors, disk full errors, no answer errors, etc… I am presently considering using one of those remailing services, so that I can have all of my mail going to one address. I am told that most use these remailers for privacy too, but my main concern is to have and to maintain "one" address. aka tex
